I made this up yesterday and I'm really digging it. I don't think I've said here that I started Weight Watchers a couple months ago. I've lost 13 pounds so far. The eggnog latte at The Coffee Shop That Shall Not Be Named is 11 Weight Watchers points. For one grande! My drink is probably not even a full point since a whole cup of soy milk is 2 points.
It's not exactly the real thing, but it works for me. Here's the recipe:
strong coffee
generous splash soy milk (as much milk/cream as you may usually like in your coffee)
1 pk Splenda
dash cinnamon
dash nutmeg
splash vanilla extract
splash imitation rum extract
Tasty!
Showing posts with label Giving up sugar. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Giving up sugar. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Sunday, August 24, 2008
What the F*** Pie
I watched the movie Waitress last night. The movie is touching, but the true story of the writer & director even more so. Actress Adrienne Shelly was 40 with a small daughter, a husband and a budding career as a filmmaker, and she was murdered shortly before the film was released.
Since landing in the hospital in June, I've been thinking a lot about my own mortality. It was heartbreaking to see Adrienne's daughter in the movie and hear the lullaby "Baby don't you cry" Adrienne wrote for the movie. The movie is ultimately joyful and quite a gift for a mother to leave a child, but, of course, the child would rather have the mother, right? Heartbreaking.
All last night I thought about the movie. And pie. Pie is big in the movie. The main character bakes pies with names like "I Hate My Husband Pie" and "Bad Baby Pie." This morning I read Patry Francis' blog post about her ritual of baking a blueberry pie for her muse every August. And I recalled that Jamey Hatley, too, has blogged about feeding her muse.
As some of y'all may know, about a year and a half ago I kicked a fierce sugar habit. But since coming home from the hospital, I have been ferociously craving chocolate cake. And since life is short, I've had some (and it was divine!). Now I wonder if it's not my body's way of asking for what it needs? Feeding the heart, feeding the muse, is there any difference? Or are these severe cravings just lovely hormonal changes brought on by perimenopause...and even if they are, do you listen to your hormones or ignore them?
It's painfully confusing to quit a bad habit and try so hard to be healthy and then end up sick. What's that supposed to mean? What's the lesson? What's the point? Maybe there's something to the idea of feeding oneself, to putting something in for all that we're putting out? If I were to create a pie right now it'd be called "What the F*** Pie." Since I have never mastered the art of pie crust, maybe I'll bake myself a What the F*** Chocolate Cake.
How do you feed yourself? How do you feed your muse? What kind of pie would you bake right now?
Since landing in the hospital in June, I've been thinking a lot about my own mortality. It was heartbreaking to see Adrienne's daughter in the movie and hear the lullaby "Baby don't you cry" Adrienne wrote for the movie. The movie is ultimately joyful and quite a gift for a mother to leave a child, but, of course, the child would rather have the mother, right? Heartbreaking.
All last night I thought about the movie. And pie. Pie is big in the movie. The main character bakes pies with names like "I Hate My Husband Pie" and "Bad Baby Pie." This morning I read Patry Francis' blog post about her ritual of baking a blueberry pie for her muse every August. And I recalled that Jamey Hatley, too, has blogged about feeding her muse.
As some of y'all may know, about a year and a half ago I kicked a fierce sugar habit. But since coming home from the hospital, I have been ferociously craving chocolate cake. And since life is short, I've had some (and it was divine!). Now I wonder if it's not my body's way of asking for what it needs? Feeding the heart, feeding the muse, is there any difference? Or are these severe cravings just lovely hormonal changes brought on by perimenopause...and even if they are, do you listen to your hormones or ignore them?
It's painfully confusing to quit a bad habit and try so hard to be healthy and then end up sick. What's that supposed to mean? What's the lesson? What's the point? Maybe there's something to the idea of feeding oneself, to putting something in for all that we're putting out? If I were to create a pie right now it'd be called "What the F*** Pie." Since I have never mastered the art of pie crust, maybe I'll bake myself a What the F*** Chocolate Cake.
How do you feed yourself? How do you feed your muse? What kind of pie would you bake right now?
Saturday, September 15, 2007
It came. I saw. I conquered.
It came yesterday with a slight whish through the mail slot. It used to enter the house like a bomb, like fireworks, like a gospel choir. The See's Candies catalog. I used to go through it and circle my favorites (sometimes numbering them in order of deliciousness) and crossing out the ones I hated (chocolate-covered ginger sounds good, but bleeck; tasted like medicine!). Seriously. I was like a kid with the Toys R Us Christmas catalog. (A quirk of mine that tickles my best friend so much I'm going to see if it works in my book.)
Then I went off sugar and I feared the catalog. I came home and found it with the rest of the mail and picked it up and raced it to recycling, holding it away from me like a stinky diaper or a vial of crack (does crack come in a vial?). I didn't want to be tempted. Let me be clear: Godiva, Ghirardelli, Cadbury, Hershey's, nothing next to See's. If you can eat sugar and you haven't had the See's experience, hustle on over to the website now. You'll thank me (or hate me, depending on how hooked you get). If you need to limit sugar, like moi, try this. You'll really thank me.
But yesterday the catalog arrived and I opened it, flipped through the pages, and felt nothing. No happy memories about the last butterscotch square (chocolate-covered brown sugar and butter; #1 in deliciousness) that melted on my tongue. No desire. No craving. It had no hold on me. I looked at it and put it in the recycling bin like any other flyer. And today, going to the site to get the url, I noticed this. My holiday chocolate-ordering just got a whole lot easier. Life is sweet, my friends.
Then I went off sugar and I feared the catalog. I came home and found it with the rest of the mail and picked it up and raced it to recycling, holding it away from me like a stinky diaper or a vial of crack (does crack come in a vial?). I didn't want to be tempted. Let me be clear: Godiva, Ghirardelli, Cadbury, Hershey's, nothing next to See's. If you can eat sugar and you haven't had the See's experience, hustle on over to the website now. You'll thank me (or hate me, depending on how hooked you get). If you need to limit sugar, like moi, try this. You'll really thank me.
But yesterday the catalog arrived and I opened it, flipped through the pages, and felt nothing. No happy memories about the last butterscotch square (chocolate-covered brown sugar and butter; #1 in deliciousness) that melted on my tongue. No desire. No craving. It had no hold on me. I looked at it and put it in the recycling bin like any other flyer. And today, going to the site to get the url, I noticed this. My holiday chocolate-ordering just got a whole lot easier. Life is sweet, my friends.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Low-sugar chocolate chip zucchini bread
The original recipe called for 2 cups of white sugar, which I replaced with 1/4 c Splenda sugar, 1/2 c apple sauce and 1/2 c of currents (because I had them in the cabinet). I also reduced the oil by half (since I was adding moisture with the apple sauce) and replaced half the white flour with whole wheat pastry flour.
3 eggs
1/4 c Splenda sugar
1/2 c unsweetened apple sauce
1/2 c canola oil
2 teaspoons vanilla
2 c shredded zuke
1 c chopped walnuts
1 c chopped Dagoba 73% cacao drops (or you could use semisweet chips)
1/2 c currants
1 tablespoon orange zest
1 1/2 c white flour
1 1/2 c whole wheat pastry flour
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
1. Blend flours, baking powder, soda, salt, spices and orange zest.
2. Beat eggs, add sugar and beat until well blended.
3. Stir in oil, vanilla, zuke, nuts, chocolate chips and currents.
4. Stir in dry ingredients.
5. Turn batter into 2* greased 9 x 5 inch pans.
6. Bake at 350 for 50** minutes or until done. Remove loaves from pan and cool.
*My loaves are kind of short. Maybe it's the altitude? But next time I'll only use one pan.
**My loaves were done in 33 minutes, though our oven temperature isn't reliable.
Thanks H for the zuke from your garden!
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Low-sugar blueberry corn muffins
These are kind of dense, but tasty. (There's a bad joke in there, but I'm going to leave it alone.) The original recipe called for white flour, which I replaced with whole wheat pastry flour, and 1/3 cup of white sugar, which I replaced with 2 packets of stevia. Cornmeal still has a medium glycemic index level, so if you're concerned about your sugar intake, be sure to eat them with a good protein (such as a boiled egg).
Here's the recipe:
1 cup whole wheat pastry flour (which you can buy in bulk at natural food stores)
1 cup yellow cornmeal
2 packets powdered stevia (I've heard the liquid kind isn't good to bake with.)
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
3/4 teaspoon salt
6 tablespoons butter
1 large egg
1 cup buttermilk (I used 1 cup 1% milk and 2 tablespoons lemon juice)
2 cups blueberries
1. Preheat oven to 375 and grease muffin tin(s)*.
2. Combine dry ingredients. Cut in butter with pastry cutter until the mixture resembles coarse meal.
3. Beat the egg, and to buttermilk or sour milk.
4. Add liquid ingredients to dry ingredients. Do not overmix (lumps are OK).
5. Fold in blueberries.
6. Fill cups about 3/4 full (this batter doesn't rise as high as batter made with white flour).
7. Bake about 15-20 minutes (until brown on top).
*It's supposed to make about 1 dozen muffins, but I used mini-muffin tins and it made 24 mini-muffins and there's some leftover batter in the fridge.
Here's the recipe:
1 cup whole wheat pastry flour (which you can buy in bulk at natural food stores)
1 cup yellow cornmeal
2 packets powdered stevia (I've heard the liquid kind isn't good to bake with.)
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
3/4 teaspoon salt
6 tablespoons butter
1 large egg
1 cup buttermilk (I used 1 cup 1% milk and 2 tablespoons lemon juice)
2 cups blueberries
1. Preheat oven to 375 and grease muffin tin(s)*.
2. Combine dry ingredients. Cut in butter with pastry cutter until the mixture resembles coarse meal.
3. Beat the egg, and to buttermilk or sour milk.
4. Add liquid ingredients to dry ingredients. Do not overmix (lumps are OK).
5. Fold in blueberries.
6. Fill cups about 3/4 full (this batter doesn't rise as high as batter made with white flour).
7. Bake about 15-20 minutes (until brown on top).
*It's supposed to make about 1 dozen muffins, but I used mini-muffin tins and it made 24 mini-muffins and there's some leftover batter in the fridge.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Sugar blues
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Best damn birthday cake ever!
In December I went off sugar. Everyone wanted to know for how long, so I decided until my birthday...which is Saturday. Between December and now, I've had 2 regular Cokes and 2 regular cookies (it was work; I was testing recipes for my book) and a few bites of fruitcake (it's a hubby/Grandmama thing...you wouldn't understand).
Today, I made myself a low-sugar chocolate birthday cake and good grief was it sweet! It was tasty and I immediately wanted MORE so I stuck it in the freezer until Saturday. But now I feel a little sick. This recipe is less than 1/2 the sugar in my usual chocolate cake recipe, but next time I'll use even less sugar. Give it a try:
1 stick butter
1/2 cup + 2 tablespoons Splenda sugar blend (too sweet for me!-could be cut to 1/3 cup)
1 packet (about 1/4 cup) baby food prunes
2 teaspoons vanilla
2 eggs
2/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon salt
1 cup organic whole wheat pastry flour (bulk from Whole Foods)
1 cup white flour
3/4 cup water
1 airport bottle (about 1/4 cup) coffee liqueur (or eliminate liqueur and increase water to 1 cup)
2/3 cup 73% cacoa Dagoba choco chips (I'll cut these, next time.)
Frosting:
3/4 cup Splenda sugar blend (Will cut to 1/2 cup next time.)
1/3 cup cocoa
1/2 stick butter
3 tablespoons brewed coffee
1 teaspoon vanilla
For decoration:
1 cup chopped walnuts
This is a one bowl cake. Cream the sugar and butter together. Add the eggs, vanilla and baby food prunes and beat until smooth. Add the cocoa, baking powder, salt, baking soda and whole wheat flour, blend. Add the white flour, water and coffee liqueur, blend. Fold in chips. Bake in greased and floured cake pan(s) for 20 minutes or so at 350 (my oven runs hot, so cook until a toothpick comes out clean). Cool on a rack. Frost the bottom layer and cover with 1/2 cup chopped walnuts. Cover with 2nd layer and frost just the top and sprinkle with remaining walnuts. (There's not enough frosting to cover the sides--a way to cut down on sugar, don't you know.)
Sunday, April 08, 2007
Happy Easter
We colored eggs yesterday. Here are a few of the faves. I ate one for breakfast with some wheat toast with apricot "simply fruit." Last night I went to a birthday party (Yay E!) and passed up what looked like a heavenly cake. But, last night I also wore jeans I bought 3 years ago when I was just shy of fitting them. They were a little tight, but I thought I'd continue to lose and wear them within a month. Not only did I never wear them, but I actually grew. They hung in the back of my closet for 3 years. Until last night. Skipping the cake was worth it. This morning I celebrate all kinds of new births. Happy Easter, y'all!
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Recipes
The first is for whole wheat (and somewhat healthier) pancakes. I made it up the other day...and it worked. I thought they were delish.
1/2 cup white flour
1/2 cup whole wheat flour
3 tsp baking powder (I find this works at high altitude; for lower elevations?)
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
1 tblsp melted butter
1 cup "sour" milk (1 cup milk + 1 tblsp lemon juice)
Typically, I'd recommend one egg, but we were out of eggs so to the above I added:
1 tblsp flour
1 tblsp corn starch
1/2 tsp canola oil
2 tblsp milk
Mix the dry ingredients. Add the wet ingredients. Don't overbeat-lumps are good. I served mine with toasted walnuts (for protein, fiber & omega-3 fats) and a little warmed apricot "simply fruit." Oh yes, and butter. Very, very tasty! Next time, I'll try leaving off the butter on top and using flax oil.
The 2nd is a recipe for book sales. Or at least according to a survey of 813 people by the ad agency Spier NY quoted in Publisher's Weekly and today's Denver Post, here's why people buy books:
49% friend's recommendation
45% familiarity with author
32% description on jacket
22% reviews
21% advertisements
17% placement on best-seller list
16% reading group pick
12% cover design
Obviously, this is a very interesting topic to me. What makes you buy a book?
1/2 cup white flour
1/2 cup whole wheat flour
3 tsp baking powder (I find this works at high altitude; for lower elevations?)
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
1 tblsp melted butter
1 cup "sour" milk (1 cup milk + 1 tblsp lemon juice)
Typically, I'd recommend one egg, but we were out of eggs so to the above I added:
1 tblsp flour
1 tblsp corn starch
1/2 tsp canola oil
2 tblsp milk
Mix the dry ingredients. Add the wet ingredients. Don't overbeat-lumps are good. I served mine with toasted walnuts (for protein, fiber & omega-3 fats) and a little warmed apricot "simply fruit." Oh yes, and butter. Very, very tasty! Next time, I'll try leaving off the butter on top and using flax oil.
The 2nd is a recipe for book sales. Or at least according to a survey of 813 people by the ad agency Spier NY quoted in Publisher's Weekly and today's Denver Post, here's why people buy books:
49% friend's recommendation
45% familiarity with author
32% description on jacket
22% reviews
21% advertisements
17% placement on best-seller list
16% reading group pick
12% cover design
Obviously, this is a very interesting topic to me. What makes you buy a book?
Monday, February 26, 2007
Sugar inventory
I just made myself a cup of cocoa with unsweetened cocoa powder, Splenda and the last little bite of Dagoba 87% cacao Eclipse bar. At first I was very proud of myself that the Dagoba bar lasted me a whole month. Then I started to add up that I had also had 3 fruit-juice sweetened cookies in the last month, which didn't sound like the diet of someone who had "gone off sugar."
But then I compared last month's intake with what used to be a typical month of sugar gorging. I'd say my sugar intake for the last 30 days would have looked something like this:
40-50 tablespoons of refined sugar added to tea and decaf coffee
25-40 sodas or sugary fruit drinks
8-12 donuts & pastries (there were at least 2 donut-eating opportunities at work in the last month & Hubby and I surely would have had some at least one weekend)
2 slices of banana bread (a staff meeting)
2 pieces of Starbucks coffee cake (maybe low-fat, maybe not, but definitely high-sugar)
1/2-3/4 "big party bag" of M&M's (which I would have eaten on top of popcorn & washed down with some of the above sodas!)
6 chocolate chip cookies or chocolate chip muffins
12 pieces of candy from the many candy bowls at work
20 slices of white toast with butter (sometimes with jam)
Probably a couple servings of grape jelly on a PB&J
5 servings of white pasta
3 giant servings of white rice & flour tortillas (Chipotle burritos)
And finally for the last nail in the coffin, Hubby bought some French vanilla ice cream, chocolate syrup and Spanish peanuts this weekend. I definitely would have joined him! Instead I had unsweeted yogurt with unsweetened frozen (thawed) strawberries with Splenda.
Wow. I never wrote it all down before. These are all guesses, but they're pretty close (give or take a pound) to the amount of sugar I'd eat & drink in a typical month. Just the thought of it all makes me sick to my stomach. I'm back to feeling pretty good about my Dagoba and air cookies!
But then I compared last month's intake with what used to be a typical month of sugar gorging. I'd say my sugar intake for the last 30 days would have looked something like this:
40-50 tablespoons of refined sugar added to tea and decaf coffee
25-40 sodas or sugary fruit drinks
8-12 donuts & pastries (there were at least 2 donut-eating opportunities at work in the last month & Hubby and I surely would have had some at least one weekend)
2 slices of banana bread (a staff meeting)
2 pieces of Starbucks coffee cake (maybe low-fat, maybe not, but definitely high-sugar)
1/2-3/4 "big party bag" of M&M's (which I would have eaten on top of popcorn & washed down with some of the above sodas!)
6 chocolate chip cookies or chocolate chip muffins
12 pieces of candy from the many candy bowls at work
20 slices of white toast with butter (sometimes with jam)
Probably a couple servings of grape jelly on a PB&J
5 servings of white pasta
3 giant servings of white rice & flour tortillas (Chipotle burritos)
And finally for the last nail in the coffin, Hubby bought some French vanilla ice cream, chocolate syrup and Spanish peanuts this weekend. I definitely would have joined him! Instead I had unsweeted yogurt with unsweetened frozen (thawed) strawberries with Splenda.
Wow. I never wrote it all down before. These are all guesses, but they're pretty close (give or take a pound) to the amount of sugar I'd eat & drink in a typical month. Just the thought of it all makes me sick to my stomach. I'm back to feeling pretty good about my Dagoba and air cookies!
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Coincidence?
Hmmm. Two months off sugar, and Hershey's announces it's laying off 1,500 employees. Could it be because I'm not doing my part any more? Employees at M&Ms Mars better look out: this is the first time I've gone this long without an M&M. :-)
Friday, January 26, 2007
Holy low-sugar chocolate, Batman!
OMG! I just had a piece of a Dagoba Eclipse Bar. 87% cacoa and only 4 grams of sugar for 1/2 a bar (I had about an 1/8th of a bar). They call it "extra bittersweet." Wow. They are not kidding. At first it tasted really sweet (and REALLY good) and I thought, uh oh, I'm in trouble now. But it turned bitter (in a good way) and left just a real dark chocolate taste on my tongue, which is good because it left me with no desire to immediately scarf the rest of the bar. Whew, that's a pretty intense little candy. How intense? On their website Dagoba calls it a "test" for chocolate lovers. It's 2nd only to 100% baking chocolate with no sugar added.
Their website says that 1.4 oz of chocolate (little over 1/2 one of their bars) only has as much caffeine as a cup of decaf. I wonder...I didn't have near that much, but I feel like I just had a shot of espresso! Another reason I'm not rushing to eat the whole thing.
Their website says that 1.4 oz of chocolate (little over 1/2 one of their bars) only has as much caffeine as a cup of decaf. I wonder...I didn't have near that much, but I feel like I just had a shot of espresso! Another reason I'm not rushing to eat the whole thing.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
The healthy writer...an oxymoron?
For me it has been. My health was always one of the things that got ignored when I was working on a project. We've all heard the stories of authors writing with a bottle of wine or whiskey at their side. But my drugs of choice were caffeine and sugar. And for good reason: Our brains run on glucose (sugar) and caffeine opens up pathways in the brain. So I'd eat "writing vitamins" (M&Ms) and drink lattes by the bucket. I pumped out 4 books that way.
But over a year ago, I was forced to stop drinking caffeinated coffee because I was having a tiny little problem with my heart. Instead of going thump, thump, thump. It started going thump...thump...thump.................(terrified gasp!) thump. Or sometimes, THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! Took me many months and trips to the doctor before I was willing to hear her when she said, "Do you think it might be the caffeine?" Finally I was desperate enough to give up coffee...and what do you know? My heart started beating normally. Sort of. For me.
Sort of normal heartbeats were good enough for a year. But then, (well hell, in for a penny in for a pound) I started taking Prozac. And my anxiety level decreased so much that I was able to really, deeply, truly relax for the first time in ... possibly forever. All the cells in my body went, ahhhhh in deep ocean breath. My shoulders dropped from my ears. My hips unclenched. As the soul singers used to say, my back bone slipped. And I had what my friend Marion calls an "IFI," an incredible fucking insight: this is how I was supposed to feel.
Unfortunately, my body didn't believe that and very quickly adjusted to the extra serotonin in my brain and back up went the anxiety. But I had had a taste of paradise and I wanted it back!
Enter my new acupuncturist, Dr. Yu. I've had acupuncture before from 2 different people, and they were good and helped me with different aches and pains. But this is at a whole nother level. Dr. Yu looked at my tongue and took my pulse and knew me. You know what I'm saying? Instead of asking me questions about my health, she told me things about myself. One of the things she told me was that sugar had to go. Actually, she gently suggested avoiding it. But I knew as soon as she said it that it was time.
So 5 weeks ago I stopped guzzling sodas and stopped with the "writing vitamins" and the cookies and donuts and Starbucks classic coffee cake and chocolate chip muffins and all of it. I have to say that anybody who knows me knows this is HUGE. This is like saying that for 5 weeks I've been learning to live without air, without water. And it's been hard. But I'm making it. Just like the recovering alkies and junkies, one day at a time.
I started doing what every good writer does: research. It turns out there's a connection between sugar and anxiety and weight gain. They all fuel each other. I won't go into it here--I'm not a doctor, nor do I play one on my blog--but if you have questions or want to chat about it, email me.
Do I feel better? Well, that's hard to say. I'm still shall we say a little crabby sometimes. And I haven't gotten back to the all-over ocean breath state. But I've lost a lot of weight (don't know how much because I haven't weighed myself because this isn't really about weight loss, even though, trust me, weight loss is a good thing). Even better, I feel empowered by this very new idea that I am stronger than my sweet tooth.
At least I have been so far. The novel I'm working on is going to test me. I don't know how to write a book without mega doses of caffeine and sugar. But so far grapefruit, apples, dried cherries, cashews, garlic hummus and decaf with cream and Splenda are getting me through. And I've found a really tasty no-refined-sugar, no-wheat, no-dairy, no-eggs, chocolate chip cookie ("air cookies," both my boss and my husband called them, but they're really good!). I should say it was really good, because I've had one so far. Oh my God, I've had ONE COOKIE IN A MONTH! And it was an air cookie.
Hmm. I just might be okay.
Stay tuned. I'll let you know how it goes.
But over a year ago, I was forced to stop drinking caffeinated coffee because I was having a tiny little problem with my heart. Instead of going thump, thump, thump. It started going thump...thump...thump.................(terrified gasp!) thump. Or sometimes, THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! Took me many months and trips to the doctor before I was willing to hear her when she said, "Do you think it might be the caffeine?" Finally I was desperate enough to give up coffee...and what do you know? My heart started beating normally. Sort of. For me.
Sort of normal heartbeats were good enough for a year. But then, (well hell, in for a penny in for a pound) I started taking Prozac. And my anxiety level decreased so much that I was able to really, deeply, truly relax for the first time in ... possibly forever. All the cells in my body went, ahhhhh in deep ocean breath. My shoulders dropped from my ears. My hips unclenched. As the soul singers used to say, my back bone slipped. And I had what my friend Marion calls an "IFI," an incredible fucking insight: this is how I was supposed to feel.
Unfortunately, my body didn't believe that and very quickly adjusted to the extra serotonin in my brain and back up went the anxiety. But I had had a taste of paradise and I wanted it back!
Enter my new acupuncturist, Dr. Yu. I've had acupuncture before from 2 different people, and they were good and helped me with different aches and pains. But this is at a whole nother level. Dr. Yu looked at my tongue and took my pulse and knew me. You know what I'm saying? Instead of asking me questions about my health, she told me things about myself. One of the things she told me was that sugar had to go. Actually, she gently suggested avoiding it. But I knew as soon as she said it that it was time.
So 5 weeks ago I stopped guzzling sodas and stopped with the "writing vitamins" and the cookies and donuts and Starbucks classic coffee cake and chocolate chip muffins and all of it. I have to say that anybody who knows me knows this is HUGE. This is like saying that for 5 weeks I've been learning to live without air, without water. And it's been hard. But I'm making it. Just like the recovering alkies and junkies, one day at a time.
I started doing what every good writer does: research. It turns out there's a connection between sugar and anxiety and weight gain. They all fuel each other. I won't go into it here--I'm not a doctor, nor do I play one on my blog--but if you have questions or want to chat about it, email me.
Do I feel better? Well, that's hard to say. I'm still shall we say a little crabby sometimes. And I haven't gotten back to the all-over ocean breath state. But I've lost a lot of weight (don't know how much because I haven't weighed myself because this isn't really about weight loss, even though, trust me, weight loss is a good thing). Even better, I feel empowered by this very new idea that I am stronger than my sweet tooth.
At least I have been so far. The novel I'm working on is going to test me. I don't know how to write a book without mega doses of caffeine and sugar. But so far grapefruit, apples, dried cherries, cashews, garlic hummus and decaf with cream and Splenda are getting me through. And I've found a really tasty no-refined-sugar, no-wheat, no-dairy, no-eggs, chocolate chip cookie ("air cookies," both my boss and my husband called them, but they're really good!). I should say it was really good, because I've had one so far. Oh my God, I've had ONE COOKIE IN A MONTH! And it was an air cookie.
Hmm. I just might be okay.
Stay tuned. I'll let you know how it goes.
Saturday, December 30, 2006
A limbo time
"How strange all this time off is," my husband said over a dinner of fried eggs and bacon. "It's like a vacation."
No, a vacation means fun and relaxation. This has not been a vacation. Oh, I've relaxed. I've relaxed my brains out. I've taken 14 billion hot baths with lavender and orange essential oils and soaked my tired old ass in Tired Old Ass Soak. I've slept the sleep of an innocent newborn, with morning, afternoon and evening naps. I've watched movies and gobbled books like bon bons: Caucasia by Danzy Senna, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince (do I have to say who it's by?) and Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. All of which I recommend.
Still, all this time snowed in the house (with periodic shoveling breaks) isn't a vacation. This is some weird limbo. Weekdays are no different than weekends. I sleep at all hours of the day and night. I feel heavier and lighter at the same time. I feel more like someone who's in recovery from something, an illness, a broken heart (sugar addiction?) than someone on a vacation. Like being on a retreat instead of at a resort. Not fun, but not un-fun either.
But maybe I feel in limbo because this is a limbo time. During the holidays normal life ceases, but the parties, shopping and feasting are only temporary. And now we're betwixt and between the passing of one year and the beginning of another.
No, a vacation means fun and relaxation. This has not been a vacation. Oh, I've relaxed. I've relaxed my brains out. I've taken 14 billion hot baths with lavender and orange essential oils and soaked my tired old ass in Tired Old Ass Soak. I've slept the sleep of an innocent newborn, with morning, afternoon and evening naps. I've watched movies and gobbled books like bon bons: Caucasia by Danzy Senna, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince (do I have to say who it's by?) and Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. All of which I recommend.
Still, all this time snowed in the house (with periodic shoveling breaks) isn't a vacation. This is some weird limbo. Weekdays are no different than weekends. I sleep at all hours of the day and night. I feel heavier and lighter at the same time. I feel more like someone who's in recovery from something, an illness, a broken heart (sugar addiction?) than someone on a vacation. Like being on a retreat instead of at a resort. Not fun, but not un-fun either.
But maybe I feel in limbo because this is a limbo time. During the holidays normal life ceases, but the parties, shopping and feasting are only temporary. And now we're betwixt and between the passing of one year and the beginning of another.
Or maybe this is just what it feels like to do the limbo in snow boots....
Thursday, December 21, 2006
Comfort me with apples (blizzard pt 4)
My bestest friend Diane sent us these apples (and oranges and grapefruits) for Christmas. They arrived yesterday when the post office was still open. Our mail carrier Barbara was up to her knees, but she came. This fruit sure is coming in handy for a snowed-in person who's supposed to avoid sugar (a topic for a future post).
It has finally stopped snowing (after more than 2 feet of snow), but Lord help us they're calling for 3-6 more inches on Saturday! Typically you can tell folks from Colorado by their reaction to the snow. All together now Coloradans: "we needed the moisture." Yep, it's awful now (though right now the sun is shining), but come spring....
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